If you’re looking forward to doing something special for Mother’s Day on Sunday, we wish you all the best – but this article isn’t for you.
It’s not that we don’t want you to have a great day (we do) or that we take issue with Mother’s Day itself (we don’t – mums are amazing and deserve a little pampering).
But we know that not everyone will feel like celebrating on Sunday. Mother’s Day can generate a host of complicated feelings if your mum isn’t around, you’ve lost a child, miscarried or struggled to conceive.
These feelings can be compounded by the commercial side of Mother’s Day – the adverts popping into your inbox in the lead-up to the big day and the cards, chocolates and flowers on sale in the supermarket.
If you find Mother’s Day difficult, here are some tips to help you get through it.
- Instead of trying to ignore the day and suppress your feelings, acknowledge it’s on the horizon and that there could be a few tears.
- Plan how you’ll spend the day. If you’re staying in, treat yourself by watching a favourite movie or cooking a special meal. If you’re going out, choose your venue wisely. Visiting a pub or restaurant full of families celebrating Mother’s Day might be upsetting.
- Light a candle or plant a tree in memory of the person you’re thinking about.
- Go for a walk, run, swim or cycle. Sometimes, it’s easier to reflect on feelings and memories while exercising, especially if you’re in the great outdoors.
- Donate to a charity that has personal significance to you.
- Tell a friend or family member that you’re finding things tough and spend some time with them.
- Avoid social media, so you don’t come across any Mother’s Day-related posts that upset you.
- Reach out for support. Bereavement charity Cruse has a helpline (0808 808 1677). Baby loss charity Tommy’s has lots of helpful information on its website, as does the Good Grief Trust.
From all of us here at Spencer Harvey, take care of yourself and thanks for reading.